I once had an attorney ask a witness, "So, any conversations you would have had with your mother about her will would have been prior to her death?" Everyone in the room had an extremely confused look on their face to say the least. The witness answered, "Uh, yeah?" That one was several years ago but sticks with me to this day! :)

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haha love it. "Uh, yeah," with the proper inflection that I'm sure this witness used, is the total equivalent of "Duh," which we all know equals, "Yes, dumb ass. Hello!!!!"
That is a good one!!
Haha! thats funny, here are a bunch more like yours, "Things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down by court reporters"

http://www.avolitesshop.co.uk/avo/jokes/court-reporter.htm

here is a funny one:
Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?
A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.
hehehehehe
How about a crazy answer?

Q And what did you do when you felt the wheel coming off your car?
A I pushed on that brake, I grabbed da wheel. I even yelled whoa, motherfucker.

From a deposition taken many years ago in Perris, California.
Yeah, I once took a job in Paris -- I mean, Perris.

Gregorio

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