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Can't keep poker face

I am a student and I've been sitting in. Today I got spoken to by the owner of the agency because the reporter told her that I reacted to testimony with a facial expression. She told the owner that it happened more than once. I'm not really aware of it happening. How do you keep the poker face when the testimony is either so moving or sad or shocking?

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Comment by Cathryn Bauer on December 14, 2009 at 16:36: What a lousy thing to happen.

I think in the interests of fairness, the agency owner should see this thread. You might point her to it. I would like her to stop sending students out to intern with this reporter. She's a lousy example. Priority one is getting the depo taken, PERIOD. Absolutely anything disruptive that is the reporter's responsibility needs to be handled immediately, not after the depo.

Comment by Diane Jones on December 14, 2009 at 13:13: Thanks so much for all your great responses! I appreciate all your words of wisdom and have learned so much just from reading what you all wrote! I haven't been sitting in much lately, since this happened but today I just picked up the phone and called the agency to sit in tomorrow. I have sat in with about 7 different reporters there, and 6 have been kind and helpful and wonderful. The "mean" one even complained to the owner when I bent down to pick up a pen. I wanted to quickly make myself a note and she complained that I wasn't writing at that time, so I wasn't "getting everything." Unfortunately I can't make requests about sit-ins but hopefully I'll get one of the good ones, and when not, I now know how to handle it. Thanks again, Diane

Comment by Cathryn Bauer on December 13, 2009 at 7:30: Wow. This was handled ALL wrong. If your expression was somehow affecting the proceedings, she should have taken you aside at the break -- asking for a break if it was a serious enough problem -- and told you what was up, insisting that if you couldn't deal with it, you leave. The priority would have been dealing with it right then.

When the testimony is affecting, I make a point of not looking at the witness. The top of my machine or the conference table become fascinating, and that's where I fix my gaze. One thing I just knew was wrong in CR school was the emphasis on looking at the speaker when you wrote. I didn't buy it then, and I'm glad I didn't because there are just plenty of times in reporting when you shouldn't. Yes, watching the lips of the speaker does help me with taking it in, but you need to be able to work without it. An appalling number of male witnesses take this as flirtatious behavior on your part (oddly enough, they are always individuals you wouldn't look at if they were the last men on earth), or it may be disturbing to some witnesses. The instant I even get a suspicion that this is the case, I stop looking at the witness steadily during testimony.

Please don't take this reporter as an example. I don't know what was going on, but it sounds like some kind of sabotage to me. The phrase that comes to mind is "Mean Girl."

Comment by Veronica Kubat on December 10, 2009 at 6:06: That's when it's best to turn to face the wall. I have had one inappropriate moment when I really could not control the roll of my eyes because of the total bull...t that the witness was saying. I just faced the wall away from the witness (who, because I'm left-handed, is usually behind me anyway) and let-er-rip. The tearing up can't be helped. It's the snotty eye-rolling (speaking only for myself and not intended to be a criticism of anyone else who may be doing the same thing) is what is usually a problem. :-) But you get to where it is easier not to respond. But sometimes it strikes home. And we, as others have said, are only human.

Comment by Deborah Morin on December 9, 2009 at 18:24: That's pathetic that the reporter tattled on you like that. She's probably threatened by the (potential) new comers to the agency coming in taking up all the work away from her.

Comment by Mary Jo Cochran on December 9, 2009 at 18:22: That's my thought too - the reporter is looking for something to criticize you with - because it makes her look more superior.

Comment by Kelli Combs (admin) on December 9, 2009 at 16:29: We are human. I smirk or smile or sometimes even laugh (when I know it is appropriate). There are times you cannot have a poker face. It seems to me maybe this reporter was just looking for something to criticize about you.

I have also almost cried before but kept it together. Just kept my head down. You can just do the best you can do.