Had the job from hell today.   Young attorneys.  One talked 250 all day, the witness talked 250 and his attorney who said plenty talked abut 270 and objected to almost every single question for almost 300 pages.  And they kept talking on top of each other.  Your typical job from hell depo.  But add to that:

The witness was tapping shoes on the floor, both of them, like a penguin, all day long!  And at times he was tapping his nails on the table along with his feet.  Drove me crazy!!!!!  So distracting to trying to concentrate.  And he wasn't nervous, just couldn't sit still.  The brief times he wasn't tapping his feet, he was swinging side to side in his chair.  Glad it didn't squeak!

Okay, so on my depo this afternoon, at the non-taking attorney's office, he closed the door as we were ready to start, but left the door cracked.  I asked, Did you want to shut the door (it was a little noisy in the hallway) and he said no, the dog might want to come it.  So in comes a little Schnauzer of some sort with ringing bells on his collar walking around under the table back and for on my cords on the floor...............the attorney said it was "the office dog." 

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It's not you.  Young attorneys think they have something to prove.  It was the obligation of the attorneys to prepare the witness for deposition.  Apparently they didn't.  Really good attorneys have a polish and confidence about them.  They think before they speak and do not act arrogant (fast speaking is rather arrogant).
The witness was an attorney............for 32 years!   About 58 years old, I'd guess.
That's not a fun day.  However, look on the bright side; you got over 300 pages and that's a very good thing now that the hard part is over.
I think that attorneys are the worst witnesses.  They usually really like the sound of their own voice.  LOL
Oh, Kerry, that stinks.  Hate those O&1s.  It seems they are always these nightmare depos too.
I am entering the depo world after massive layoffs at the County and I must say that is very discouraging for me.
Get used to it, Rhonda, because it is becoming the norm out there.  Get out your Advil and just try to get through the day.
That's good Kelli!  I've taken more Ibuprofen and Aleve--though I alternate with buffered aspirin because it's easier on your gut, liver and kidneys--in the past few years than I ever took!  And I almost never get headaches.  It's back and arm aches!

I've told an expert doctor I'm going to take his glasses away if he doesn't stop folding and unfolding the arms repeatedly, making a clicking noise every time he does it.  I've made a witness spit out his gum. I've put my hand over a witness's wrist who kept repeatedly banging/tapping her bracelet on the table.  Always with an explanation that they are driving me effin' nuts and with a smile.  Never had a problem.


The spinning in the chair, I've had those, too, and didn't feel there was anything I could say that would stop that.  The feet tapping -- well, you had a really annoying witness!  Sorry to hear that.  I feel your pain.  :)


If they keep talking over each other, I stop them and tell them the transcript is going to be a complete mess.  If they don't stop, they get what they get in the final product.



I had a ballpoint pen clicker the other day.  It was a fast patent depo that required concentration.  I wanted to throw the pen across the room.  Then same case, different day, nervous witness twirling his microphone cord so it caused a nice static noise all day long.  S-c-r-a-t-c-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h!


The one I really couldn't believe was the doctor who reached for an apple and starting chomping in the middle of testimony.  Hello, Doctor, do you realize what you look and sound like on the video?

Omg, there's no way I would've let him eat that apple.  I would've told him that I can't understand him if he's eating and talking at the same time; perhaps we should take a break if he's hungry.  What an arrogant SOB.


Oh, yeah, I've taken many a clicking pens away.

I just had the best laugh reading your post.  We need a placard for depositions of acceptable fidgeting and unacceptable fidgeting.


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